Searching for my Methadone

Wow this first week has been tough and if I’m being quite honest I suspect things will only get more difficult. As the title suggests I’m searching for my methadone. Poker is obviously the heroine that has been pulsing through my veins for far too long and it has become apparent that I need to find some form of replacement less I drive myself insane. I really feel the winds of fate are trying to tempt me back though – I’ve had more staking offers in the last week than I’ve had in the last 2 years and twice I just happened to stumble across some juicy action in the back room of the local boozer. Is it my imagination or does the world want me to fail? Twice I walked away. Kept telling myself that just isn’t me any more but man it hurt me to do it.

As some of you are aware I qualified last month for the Santry Poker cash league that took place on Friday. It was quite fitting that my poker career should end in such a sickening fashion. I got it AI 3 ways with my AA no match for AK and KK. One does have to admit there is a sense of poetic irony in the last hand I ever intend to play in a casino. It was poker’s way of giving me one last fuck before I went on my merry way – you could call it one for the road.

Now that I’m no longer a degenerate (yeah right) Iv tried to ease myself back into the “normy” way of living – one of the benefits of giving up poker is that I have gotten back to a somewhat normal sleeping pattern and I’m far less nocturnal. I’m making daily trips to the gym again for the first time in months and I’m making good inroads into the third series of the wire (no spoilers yo). I’m still thinking in terms of EV which is to be expected I suppose – old habits die hard and all that.

Other good news is that my football is going well and I will be on the DCU Sigerson panel next season. I’m pretty happy with this considering the scope of talent that’s available but I won’t be content to sit on the line. It’s up to me now to work hard during the summer and try to force my way onto the team. Opportunities like this don’t come around very often so I need to give it my all.

That’s pretty much it for this week. I’m all ears if someone has a good replacement for poker??

Tony